My Afflation

I am currently thanking the scientists who came up with NSAIDs. And to whoever figured out that caffeine + painkillers = easing of a migraine. Today's breakfast chaser was a venti long shot flat white and 2 Aleve. The pressure in my brain has subsided enough that I feel alert for the first time all week and almost energetic enough to try this. Just skip ahead to Tom Holland at 1:44 . Why can't I stop watching this?!?!? I really can't. Having energy and clarity of thought is so energizing. I didn't realize how much energy the low-level headache I have had all week was draining me. Didn't help that I started the week slightly depleted from the weekend and it went downhill from there. And now I feel like dancing!

Yes, I am and I am not afraid to admit it. No justification. And I am not going to let it stress me out. There are some reasons behind it that make me okay with failure. Usually I would be beating myself up over failing something like this. First off, I am so sick and tired of eggs - and I love eggs!,  especially since I can't have cheesy omelettes.  Not that I usually put cheese in my omelettes, but that flat out restriction is really irksome. I like a light breakfast of Greek yogurt and fruit. The lack of raw honey every day is almost worse than the chocolate restriction. I don't have food relationship issues. Food and I get along very well. I now feed my body whole, nutritionally dense, natural foods to keep me healthy (and fit, we're getting there). Being on this for one week is causing me more anxiety than I care to deal with. Occasionally I splurge on the non-natural, not-so-nutritionally dense items, my body reminds me why I don't do that any more, and we ...

coming out of the fog (Photo credit: theloushe ) In general, I don't like airing my dirty laundry. I was taught it was uncouth, rude, nobody gives a damn, and why put your life on display like that. But you know what? I'm tired of being polite, in the shadows, hiding. It's time to tell my side of the story because everyone has heard my ex's side. And it caused a rift that can never be repaired.

I'm trying to get some energy and happiness, or at least less "meh" pumping through my veins. Walked Zoe to Starbucks this morning, shared a breakfast sandwich with her, and usually my puppy makes me happy ... But this morning everything annoy me. Even she can tell I'm in a mood. Instead of sleeping with me last night she slept on my daughters empty bed. Last night I had no energy to do much, but I had three weeks of just my own laundry to do, so three movies later, I had all of it done except the bedding. My co-workers will thank me. My hamper already does. By the way, don't watch " Joyful Noise " when moody. If you do, grab a box of tissue. Ryan Reynolds and Michael Fassbender were much better distractions. I think when I get home I'm going to start listing more things on freecycle. Time to declutter again along with the usual housecleaning. Any have any suggestions for good aroma therapy for winter blues? I really want to air...

One of these days I'll stop using chronic back pain and anxiety as excuses for not getting fit.  That day is not today though. My back is throbbing and will for the next day or so (because, you know, my menstrual cramps are more like contractions than regular abdominal cramping), and my hip just started screaming at me, and there's a headache brewing because I've been clenching my teeth again and not getting enough sleep, and come to think of it, my neck and shoulders are a little tight too.... So,  today is not the day I get motivated to exercise. Today is one of those days I try to get through without embarrassing myself or biting anyone's head off. Chronic pain (and stress) can suck it. Pass the ibuprofen. And chocolate. Especially if you know what's good for you. Pin It

192.4 Slow and steady, right? I haven't exercised much in the last two weeks, due to illness , but I am back in the saddle -- mentally at least. My problem is follow-through. I brought my work out bag to work, and barring any more issues with the CMS I should be able to get in a workout this afternoon. I've been eating a LOT of soup lately, which keeps my calories down and my fluids up. Taking a time out to have some California rolls today though. I have no idea how some people can stick to a soup diet . I'm only doing it because I have such a hard time keeping hydrated. I've been tracking my calories and I am way down, so trying to balance keeping hydrated with NOT going into starvation mode (something that happens often since I tend to hyperfocus and then forget to eat. I can go months with eating just once a day ... and then wonder why I am so tired all the time!). And that explains my slight weight gain. I realize it could be worse. I really need to up my activ...

Bloated again. Better be water weight gain Back up to 193lbs. I swear I keep losing and gaining the same 5lbs. This would be fine if I was at my goal weight . I'm still very far from my goal. Each week it seems farther away. What I wouldn't give to make it down to 180lbs, my weight at this time last year. I'm still in shock that I have gained  20lbs in the last year. How the heck did that happen??!!?? New goals : The cardio I've been doing sometimes leaves me wanting more --  feeling incomplete. I used to have pretty good upper body strength and I miss it. I want my arms back, not these granny-flappy things that have replaced them. And the rolls under my bra can get to moving out too. Chronic back pain in the last decade has had people doing a lot of heavy lifting for me, literally and figuratively. And it shows in my arms, back, torso, etc.  I need to strengthen my core, so that I can lift more weights and strengthen my arms. It's a good thing that I p...

… again. I don’t think I’ve gotten more than 4 or 5 good solid hours of sleep in the last 7 days. Some days even less, only one or two due to insomnia, children with nightmares, or hip/back pain. Despite all of my chiropractic therapy, I’m really afraid that I might be developing arthritis in my hips, knees, and hands. It runs in the family. I’ve had CTS before (had to use a brace for 6 weeks!!! thank goodness someone loaned me Dragon Naturally Speaking at the time. An English Lit major not able to type up her papers … oi!), that was no fun. I’ve given in. between @ jasperblu , @ phraktyl , and two co-workers I am going to try acupuncture. My office-mate gave me the name and number of the doctor he goes to, and she went to the trouble of finding out his rates and if he’s open on Saturdays since she knows that I live out in BFE . Boring and dry, ain't it? I’m hoping to get some time this weekend to soak in a nice hot bath. That’s my incentive to clean (don’t ask and I won’t te...